一位在美的留学生，想要考国际驾照。在考试时因为过于紧张，看到地上标线是向左转。
他不放心的问道:turn left？
监考官回答：right。
于是他立刻向右转。
很抱歉他只有下次再来。
某人刻苦学习英语，终有小成。一日上街不慎与一老外相撞，忙说：i am sorry。
老外应道：i am sorry too。
某人听后又道：i am sorry three。
老外不解，问what are you sorry for？
某人无奈，道：i am sorry five。
若干年前，一位老兄到纽约公干。工作之余，也打算休息休息，看看风景名胜。
为此他查了大量的资料，做了充分的准备。众多名胜之一，就有自由女神像（Statue of Liberty）。
为了确保能够到达仰慕已久的地方，他甚至把负责自由女神像参观的联系电话都找到 - 666-2613。
于是，他就打辆出租出发了。下面是他和出租司机的对话。
Driver: “ Where do you want to go., sir? “
Mr. D: “ FREE Woman, Do you know where I can find Free Woman? “
Driver: “ What? :-O Hey man, here is America, nothing is free !!! “
Mr. D: “ Oh, how comes. I read it from yellow page. See,
here is the phone number, sex-sex-sex-two-sex-one-free.“
某年大学联招英文作文试题 “黑羊与白羊“请考生看完前段提示后接著完成全文~~~提示如下：
“One day the black goat meet the white goat on a bridge..”
有一名考生的回答如下：
then the black goat asked the white goat “Can you speak Chinese?“.
The white goat answered “Why not!“
以下全部以中文做答。。。。。。
昨天来了个老外，进到办公室，前台小姐左看右看，大家都在打游戏，只有自己比较清闲，就面带微笑的：
前台小姐：“hello?”
老外：“hi.”
前台小姐：“you have what thing?”
老外：“can you speak English? ”
前台小姐：“if I not speak English, I am speaking
what?”
老外：“can anybody else speak English? ”
前台小姐：“you yourself look. all people are playing,
no people have time, you can wait, you wait, you not wait,
you go.”
老外：“good heavens. anybody here can speak
English?”
前台小姐：“ shout what shout, quiet a little, you on
earth have what thing.”
老外：“I want to speak to your head.”
前台小姐：“head not zai.you tomorrow come.”
帮忙把英文翻译一下,谢谢!
是把英文翻译成中文哎!没办法,主要是我看不懂嘛...英语太烂